Half Way!

I'm PREGNANT! Preggers, expecting, fruitful, gravid, gestating, with child, parous.  It's crazy to think that we've already gone from this...

to this...

in just 20 weeks.  Well I guess technically it has been a little less than 20 weeks.  But I was probably stressing the first 5 weeks before we knew we were expecting enough to count it as part of the 20 officially.  I figured I better document a little bit of how the last 20 (15) weeks have gone. I'm trying to keep a journal too, to give to the child, but it won't hurt to put down a few more details here :)

I was only a couple days late with when I was debating with myself VERY early morning on June 5 about whether I should take a test or not.  We'd been trying for awhile and I was pretty sure this month was a wash.  But I REALLY had to pee and I had to decide quick.  So I decided to pee on it and I didn't look for awhile because I didn't know if I could take another negative - even though I was telling myself to expect it to come up negative.  But then it didn't.  WHAT!?!? For reals.  I was freaking out.  And Tanner was asleep still and so I paced in the bathroom for several minutes trying to figure out how to tell him.  I thought I'd leave it by the sink and then he'd see it when he got up for work.  So I went to lay down but couldn't sleep.  So I was about to say something and then he got up to pee.  Flip.  So I laid there thinking and thinking and wondering if he would see it.  But no light went on and I was dying so I got up to just show him.  So I turned on the light and he squinted as I was showing him and he's just like, "What?"  And I said "Look at it."  He asked if that was good, and I said YES!  And then he hi fived me and walked out of the bathroom and got back in bed.  Haha.  Not my best execution.  Oh well.  We laid in bed for the next hour and a half not able to sleep and letting everything sink in.  It was still an EXCEEDINGLY exciting moment though!!

My friend at the hospital offered to do any ultrasounds for me (after all of work found out a couple weeks later).  My first appointment got changed (and I was basically promised they'd do an ultrasound there) and I decided I couldn't wait another second to get an ultrasound, so I called her and she could do it that day.  Luckily Tanner was able to swing by at lunch and this was our first image of the wee thing.

July 11.  9 weeks 3 days.  Heart rate was 151.

Yeah - that was a pretty amazing experience.  We had miscarried at about 7 weeks last fall and this little peanut looked SO much bigger than last time.  We were a couple weeks farther along, but still trying not to get too crazy excited.  We also decided we wanted to wait to tell all our family until we were a little farther along this time around and my sister was getting married in August so we decided we were going to wait till then to make that announcement.  It was a lot harder than I thought it was going to be to wait another 5 weeks!
Jackie did another ultrasound right before we were going home so we'd have a fresher pic to show the fam.

August 6.  13 weeks 1 day.  Heart rate was 163.

We had a double family bbq planned for the 11th of August.  We had cookies baked at a bakery in Bountiful that were shaped like baby things and decorated really cute.  Before dinner started while everyone was just hanging out, I pulled out a tray of them and set them on a table where my parents, Tanner's parents and Tanner were sitting.  Clare started off saying we shouldn't be starting with dessert, and sometime in those seconds my mom figured it out and she screamed and then everyone started figuring it out.  Everyone from inside came outside saying they thought an announcement was being made.  It was so fun.  SO completely worth waiting to do in person!  And the cookies were delicious!

What else.  We were pretty convinced it was going to be a girl.  Only because we both wanted a boy so bad and the Chinese gender calendar said it was a girl and heart rate old wives tale suggested girl.  A little after 16 weeks we bugged Jackie again to do another ultrasound to see if we could see what it was.  Tanner got to come for this one too.  

August 30.  16 weeks 4 days.

 We were completely shocked when we saw the little weiner.  I thought Tanner was gonna be disappointed but he said he was just saying he wanted a girl so he would be prepared when it was.  Psych.  Oh man.  It was so cool.  Seeing him on ultrasound is definitely the best part so far.  I know I'm pregnant, but every time she pops the probe on me and a tiny human shows up on the screen, I'm always surprised...or something...not sure what the word is.  I LOVE it!  I love seeing him move.  I love seeing how much he's changed in the couple weeks since the last ultrasound. 

At first I was thinking he looked pretty gangster - flippin a peace sign.  But maybe it's just more like E.T.

My official big ultrasound isn't till the 7th of October - 22 weeks.  So grateful for Jackie to be willing to do these so we aren't dying of impatience all the time :)

A couple weeks later she found me and said we should look again just for fun.  Not gonna turn that down.  

September 13.  18 weeks 4 days.

I love how long his little legs look.

 Here are some random tid-bits of personal pregnancy info.

• I was trying to be vegan for a couple months before we found out and at about 6 weeks vegan things made me want to puke and all I wanted was meat.  So that kind of went out the window and might be out forever.  That's a whole different story. 
• The whole first trimester really wasn't bad.  I never puked.  I just had a somewhat constant feeling of "blah".  Food didn't sound good but anytime I started eating all was ok.  
• I didn't feel too tired - seems like second trimester has been worse for fatigue for me. I do get really out of breath really easy which feels embarrassing.
• My boobs have definitely grown and have been super tender since the VERY beginning.  That never happened the first time.  
• I don't feel like I pee all the time - but some days it does seem a little excessive.  Nothing consistent enough for me to feel like it's a big pregnancy change.  
• I think I've been less moody since becoming pregnant.  I'm pretty sure Tanner would agree with that :)
• Very early on I started having CRAZY dreams. Lots of pregnancy related bizarre ones, but almost on a nightly basis I have really vivid and wild, memorable dreams.  
• The "blahness" went away almost right at 13 weeks.  I've been totally fine with any and all food since.  
• Smells never really bothered me.  
• I haven't had any really bizarre or intense cravings.  Ice cream - although that is nothing new.  Things definitely sounded better than others in the first trimester (hence the Arby's and shakes and other meat and inappropriate foods).  And I never threw up so of course I gained far more than I should have first trimester.  Oops.
• I had been running fairly consistently up until the last week or two.  I guess what I am experiencing is a pretty early onset of pubic symphysis diastasis.  (my pubic bone relaxing and starting to separate in anxious anticipation for birthing). I have had pain in my pubic bone for awhile (5+ weeks) but running was still okay.  The last time I ran I could barely walk or lift up my legs without almost excruciating pain.  That was the end of running.  Even fast walking is very painful so I'm finding other things to do.  
• We already have 4 boxes of diapers and quite a few outfits (most were bought before we were even pregnant the second time), and some matchbox cars.  You know - the essentials.  
• I felt him move for SURE one week ago.  19 weeks exactly.  I was feeling stuff a little before but wasn't convinced.  Last Monday I was convinced.  He's actually kind of squirmy right now.  Seems like he's a little more active at night.  Awesome!  This will probably be my new favorite part of being pregnant.  Tanner hasn't got to feel it yet. Hopefully soon enough. 
•  I've been reading up a lot on the natural childbirthing way :)  That's the goal.  And I'm hiring a doula.  Weird maybe, but I am way excited and feel really good about it.  So we'll see how it goes.  
• Due February 10.
• Tanner is incredibly excited and it is so fun to talk to him about all the upcoming adventures that will be parenting.  
• Heartburn.  Oh you devilish heartburn.  That has probably been the most obnoxious thing.  I have had bad heartburn for quite a few years.  I do feel like it has gotten much worse though since being pregnant.  Maybe we will end up with a hairy child.  They say there's actually science behind that - because progesterone loosens the stomach sphincter and also causes hair growth so...miracles could happen!
• I started feeling like my belly pooch was more pronounced at about 13 weeks.  But I could still hide it and it really wasn't obvious until basically last week.  Even still sometimes I think it just looks like a gross, fat, too many donuts belly. 
• I really think I've breezed through this first half without feeling too terribly different or debilitated :)  Can't wait for the second half and can not wait to meet the little man and see what he looks like and what kind of personality develops out of him.  I feel like my joy is full right now - can't imagine what it will feel like in another 20 weeks!