Tuesday, July 15, 2014

5 months!

This has been a big month for Harvey. Lots of new things started happening. He got his 4 month shots during this last month. He had his first camping trip (see earlier blog), got his first two teeth, started sitting up on his own, and started rolling from back to front and vice versa more consistently and deliberately. It seems like all he wants to do now is ROLL. I've found him in some crazily different positions than how I laid him down at night - which reminds me - we got rid of his baby lounger/bed thing and he's been in his crib for most of the last month too.  That's a lot of stuff for just a wee little thing.  Maybe that's why I think this last month has been one of the hardest. We have just had some serious hard stretches - teething and shots and he also got a cold in the mix too so it was just rough.  Lots of fussiness and beyond. And I guess with all of that it has made me doubt myself and my methods of mothering more than I think I should or would like. Is it all that stuff that's making it hard, is he just kind of a more difficult kid in general, or is there something I am doing that is messing him up and making life harder for everyone??? He went through a patch there too where he was waking up and eating like every 1-2 hours for a few nights in a row. I was DYING. It was so painful. Growth spurt too?? Gosh I don't know.  And then I started thinking about sleep and how he was not even close to sleeping through the night and fighting napping more than ever, and I didn't know if I should let him cry it out (him crying things out can be a LONG time), or WHAT was I supposed to do to help this kid sleep better.  There were a few days that were really rough for me emotionally and mentally and physically too. I haven't come to a lot of conclusions about what's best.  I'm trying to get more consistency in his life because I think that will help with the inconsistency of who's watching him - Tanner, me, babysitter, etc. If we all could get on the same page maybe everyone would be happier.  I still don't know exactly how to do it but we're working on it.  He's back to waking up about 3-4 hours at night, which is doable.  And even though I am still way tired, it's not as bad, and I almost don't even mind, because I miss him so much at work that it's nice to have a few extra moments with him, even if it's at the expense of my sleep.  I'm still trying to figure it out.  Do I need more tough love or will things just work themselves out and he needs extra loving?   But in the meantime of trying to figure life out, I am trying to give myself some slack and trust my instincts.  But I still hope I'm not parenting in a way that is a disservice to him. I shouldn't make it sound like he is this awful kid that cries all the time.  He isn't at ALL. We have just had some moments :)  He really is so smiley and happy (when he's not tired or hungry) and incredibly talkative lately. It is the best. He'll get going jabbering and sometimes it is for like 5 straight minutes.  Tanner hasn't appreciated it so much when he had a few VERY early mornings and I brought him into our bed so I could still lay down and he just had stories to tell!

Some other things that he is doing that I absolutely love - When you put something in front of him that he wants, his face gets all scrunched up and serious and he flaps his arms up and down really fast before he starts reaching for it really quick/aggressive like.  He's getting really good with his precision in grabbing at things.  He's getting his opinions about stuff too.  He'll purse his lips a lot more now when he doesn't want his binky and arches his back when he doesn't want to be sitting in his car seat or laying down.  It's funny. Most of the time.  He's laughing a lot more which is the absolute best.  It's funny the things he finds funny.  You'll randomly stumble upon a face or action or sound that he finds hilarious and it's so much fun!  He still loves his baby bjorn.  When he's facing out in it when we go for walks or whatever, he randomly and frequently lets out these random giggles/squeals of delight and flaps all his extremities at the same time which is basically the coolest thing ever.  For all the difficulty this last month, his awesomeness MORE than makes up the difference.

Here are some random pictures of cuteness.
Happy at the babysitters
Another cute one from Father's Day
This baby sleeps cuter than anything I even know.

He is LOVING this thing.
This picture melts my heart.

We've taken him golfing a few times and he's actually been awesome.  Tanner and I have both been able to golf 9 holes.  He either hangs out in the car seat or we pass him off to each other.  It's a great family affair!

This doesn't look so comfortable to me.
And I tried real hard to get a picture of his teeth - and this is the best I could do with a wiggle worm who wasn't too stoked on me messing with his lip. I'm getting so excited to start giving him real food!

These last two were from just a couple days ago. Some fun tummy time on Monster Grammy's awesome quilt.  Don't mind the drool.


  1. I just wanted to say that I can totally relate to your feelings of frustration and confusion about whether you are doing things right! I remember going through a phase around 5 months with Shepherd, and I'm feeling those same things pretty intensely at 2 years + 3 months this week, so I don't know if it will ever go away, but I hope just trying hard to do the right thing as a parent and loving your kid, as it is clear you do, means that you're the best mom for him. I think that's gotta be true!

  2. Carissa, you are an amazing mother! I am sure it can be hard, but I think the world of you, and Harv is lucky to have you! Also...those pictures are freakishly adorable!!!!